Jonathen

My memory of him is fresh; Almost too fresh to recall much of anything. The dead leave us hanging sometimes. They leave us with A certain numbness which is still alive and pulsating and perhaps misleading. Its never fair is it; its never expected. I had experienced death far too young to have even known life. The burning wave of A women who set herself on fire next door, out of A desperate attempt to atone the disability of her afflicted daughter. The discovery one morning of A young boy submerged under the calm and still waters of the outdoor public swimming pool. The death of my young stepbrother who ventured into the wilds of Alaska,only to succumb to A life long struggle with Asthma. Death will always surprise you; even when your looking. even when you know and wonder when the mystery will end. And yet, I was pulled my them all, even till their last moment. I was pulled and dragged and yes, even the tears were hard to to find. they seemed more easily spent on the living, and even those who were the walking dead, even they, in those last moments, even then, and perhaps more so; the tears flowed more readily, and I had to remind myself that they were still alive. They were still alive, and so was I, and so I will remain, God willing in the deep and penetrating glow that is this life.